Sigh. I do wish that DJs would learn a bit about basic geography. The full name of the UK is the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland. It has four countries inside it – England is the biggest, Scotland is to the north, Wales is to the west and Northern Ireland is a short flight or ferry across the Irish Sea.

See? It’s not that hard to explain, and even easier to understand. Yet DJs – who spend an inordinate amount of their time travelling between different countries somehow seem not to manage to pick up any geographical knowledge on their journeys.

Carl Cox, of all people, should know a bit about countries of the world by now. This is, remember, the man who undertook three different gigs on New Year’s Eve 1999 so that he could welcome in the year 2000 as many times – and be paid an obscene amount of money for doing so.

Having all your dates in England, then slapping up one Scottish date at the end of the list does not make it a tour of the UK. I’m well aware that Covid restrictions being lifted earlier in England than elsewhere in Britain have something to do with it – but don’t call things something they’re not.

You really should throw away that map Judge Jules got you, Carl…