Which DJ practically ensured last week he almost certainly won’t be invited back to a friend’s house in the future? This all happened last weekend, when the DJ and his girlfriend were asked if they would like to attend a birthday party at the home of a friend and his wife.

As the DJ wasn’t working, he duly accepted the invitation. He put on what he considered to be smart clothing, whilst his girlfriend was said to have worn an eye catching dress showing off her figure. The party consisted of an endless number of takeaway pizzas and then typical party food – including a visit from an ice cream van.

Later in the evening, the DJ was looking for the toilet. Upon receiving directions and heading up there, he discovered it was engaged. Apparently unable to wait for the bathroom to be vacated by the occupant, he saw a plant pot nearby and proceeded to bend over and do his business there.

He thought he’d got away with it – until the wife went to water her pot plant the next day and duly discovered a large brown discharge. CCTV footage taken in the corridor confirmed who the perpetrator was. The DJ’s girlfriend was not amused when receiving the news on the phone…